English Literature and History of art

Apart from making a designing clothes, my other hobbies include reading, I love to read! From literature books to contemporary poems, history ;  it is one of the reasons why I enjoy History of art so much as one of my hobbies. Enriching myself with the knowlegde of the creations such as the renaissance period, classical architexture, my particular favourite is the Baroque period.

It captures me through the representation of religious figures, and how there was the shift in comparison to the Renaisance period in which you could identify a clear distinction between Holy saints and followers.

Bartolome esteban murillo -virgin and child

I was drawn to this painting as soon as I saw it. It wouldnt have occured to me at first that this is a painting of the virgin and child. It’s probrably that reason why I like it so much! The realism of the representation of the holy Figures. How Bartolome shows baby Jesus’s hand resting against his mother to me just symbolises relationship between mother and child – in general, I believe that he capture that essence well. As to me this doesn’t look like a religious painting, but a painting that signifies the bond between mother and child. Beautiful.
The eye contact that both subjects give to the audience is alluring and reassuring. As the ominous glow around them can connote hope or the idea of an aura that surrounds them. It is this representation that challenges conventional Baroque period.

The End?

Today Tuesday the 4th of June I have officially finished High school! I had my final exams today, and now I sit here procrastinating.  It’s funny, during my revision and exams, I would list 101 things that I want to starting doing as soon as I had finished my exams, however now that its all over I feel quite lost. I’m not quite sure what to do with myself, trying to set my priorities – debating whether painting my bedroom or starting my driving lessons is more important 😛

Reflecting over my high school experience, I guess now Its struck me – reviewing the past 7 years, how so much has changed.  The friendships formed and lost. I don’t see this as the end, but a new beginning. I look forward to starting university in September, although I’m still trying to wrap my head around it, seems as though its all happening too fast- with my 18th birthday approaching I feel old!

Well on a different note, here is a poem that I made based on transformation on A Glass Menagerie – I felt as though writing this helped me to relate and accept the changes that are to come…

The seed in which she helped nurture and grow

 Now corrupted by weeds intertwining with my roots,

‘Tis all but a result of my Childish woe

Forces of nature now defining my fate

Once a beauty surrounded by the thorn that protects-

 is shun by inferior reality as I wilt.

Urging for a mother’s love she neglects

Deafened to any sense of reasoning

Rainbows paint the walls around;

Yet I’m consumed by nothing but darkness.

A stillness filled by a familiar sound-

His voice so precious and calming.

Shards of glass lay like shattered dreams;

as the candle of friendship is rekindled

My merciful reality coming apart at the seams

Not actual not lasting.

Collecting pieces, on display for all to see

Locked away they are mockingly admired

Wishing we could escape and run free.

A desire of acceptance over the sufferings of what was stolen

Now yearning to roam; a stallion of the wild!

A confined soul that can’t be refined

This unwanted crippled child

Isolated and forever alone

A mystical creature so stunning and rare,

Uniquely standing alone.

Amongst the other horses it can’t compare-

Yet broken its difference unites.

My difference however keeps me endlessly secluded

Damaged good that can never be fixed

I live in this vision deluded

Predesigned to remain cracked and broken…

A symbol of hardship and pain represented by such grace

The Blossoming blue rose

Hope still written across my face

A façade, of painted perceptions.

Good things come to those who wait, patience is the key

Though the future is unclear I still see light

A gentleman caller waits for me

Caught in this disarray, my flame shall not diminish

Creative writing – The Unknown

This is a piece of writing I wrote a few years back, I stumbled upon it again when trying to write-up my English coursework. Reading it reminded me of the state I was in 3 years ago, Lost and confused on who I was, writing was the only way I could make sense of myself, reflecting the emotions I was feeling and thoughts that were clouding my mind. Now I sit in front of this computer screen struggling to even make up a creative piece of writing for my course work – I need that spark of inspiration that ignited the girl I was 3 years ago.

I thought I’d share it with you guys – The Unknown

Follow me into the unknown

As it beacons me to the forbidden zone

As twilight comes to light the sky

I wish the sun wouldn’t say goodbye

A sudden shiver down my spine

 Bitter sweet farewell to darkness divine

 “Lord as I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I’m not scared because you’re holding my breath”, I repeat over and over again as I lay awake restless.

If I shut my eyes the nightmare returns erupting in my mind. Drowning in a pool of nothingness. Suffocating in the darkness around me, I struggle to breathe. The familiar churning sensation in the pit of my stomach…

I’m falling, falling into the shadows of the unknown. It’s got me! the crashing waves of doom, dragging me, pulling me under through my sinking guilt. As I enter this hell hole of what I call a dream, I envision myself escaping from the harsh realities of my godforsaken life.

Why me ?what have I done to deserve this? To trigger the long-lost memories of the events that had once been.

The eerie atmosphere sets the scene for my next nightmare, as I embrace the re-enactment of that dreaded day. There he stood under the willow tree, the misty fog cleared to reveal a masked phantom. I clasp my chest in despair as a thousand knives strike my heart, stealing my soul.

We had met before, but only in a distant dream that had been buried but now dug up to remind me of reality. The masked phantom only a silhouette camouflaged in against the depressing background. Where was I? I had never come across this place before, even in my frequent dreams. Everything was a gloomy grey, just me and him… standing feet apart. He takes a step forward. I freeze wondering whether I should turn and run, but my legs seemed to fail me as they are cemented to the ground. He takes another step forward, his movement sending another shiver down my spine. This time I break away, I take a step backward, but not taking my eyes off of the shadow.

As he took a step forward, I took another back keeping our distance; until…

he began to walk at a faster pace approaching me creating a steady rhythmic sound against the brown autumn leaves crackling beneath his boots.  I start walking backwards also trying to escape the clasp of the mysterious being before me….but then the scene changes, and I now see the gloomy rain clouds are hanging over me covering the light of the sun, I’d lost my way out of the light… tripping, falling stumbling.  But over what? I look up at the object that caused my concussion…a stone… but not just any stone, a grave stone. My expression relentless; as I am taken back by the name engraved on the grave stone…mine.

The familiar crackling of leaves I can hear behind me. I turn immediately. My heart still racing, pounding against my chest. He’s there in front of me now. The enemy staring down at me. He’s got one hand behind his back… I’m waiting, anticipating for him to pull out a dagger and rip my heart out.

Instead his left hand crosses his face, slowly lifting the mask.

What was a second felt like hours,

As my life then flashed like a movie clip across my eyes,  it then freezes on the clip as reality caught up with me…

the phantom was revealed…

me.